Okay.....you all know what I'm gonna say....
First.....GAUGES! NO GAUGES.....NO POWER MODS!
Second, turbo back exhaust (if your state does not do emissions on diesels). MBRP or Silverline.
Third, intake. AFE, S&B, Amsoil Nano.
Next, a new torque converter (Sun Coast or ATS) and a valvebody.
After that, you can apply the power mods and not destroy things. For what you are talking, I suggest the Edge w/ Attitude monitor over a Smarty.
This will give you a nice towing setup and plenty of power to play with.